I just love it when someone who doesn’t have kids, doesn’t ever plan to have kids, and/or despises kids rants about someone Else’s parenting. I will admit I am far from perfect and there are some really bad parents but unless you plan to pop out what some of you (I’m sure in a loving tone of voice) call a “crotch loaf” and prove what a fucking parenting wizard you would be shut the fuck up.

Don’t bitch because someone isn’t spanking their (what you have deemed) brat for screaming in the OMGWTF!!! I’M TRYING TO SHOP AND THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND ME AND MY NEED TO NOT BE BOTHERED BY YOUR LITTLE CROTCH DROPPING!!! grocery store. If you are the one with the fucking problem then maybe YOU should leave. If I had left every time P had a meltdown when he was a baby/ young toddler we would have starved to death. Believe me when I say I was way more embarrassed than it seemed and I would have loved to shop without the screaming. If it annoying you from 2 aisles over imagine having front row seats. Shopping cart=P’s version of red kryptonite. Not every screaming child is just being a brat and while I agree it is slightly more annoying than a relaxing massage to listen to, Get over it.

If you are somewhere that is not “kid friendly” or “kid oriented” or WTF ever and OMG someone has to bring a child there for whatever reason it isn’t your job to be a jackass and sigh and roll your eyes and OMG WTF. Shit happens and sometimes a parent has to bring a toddler to a doctors appointment, accountants office, insurance agency….From someone who has had their feet up in stirrups while praying their toddler isn’t traumatized by anything he sees or impaled by a medical device, why yes I would love to be able to have a painful and somewhat embarrassing procedure done without my child, are you volunteering to babysit? Exactly, so bite me you judgmental assmonkey.

May the fleas from a thousand camels infest you crotch and your arms shrink 15 inches.