Ordinaryfreak

I really do hope there aren’t a lot of dissappointed folks clicking on the possibly related posts and ending up here. Mine seem to end up on the…um….err…type of posts that have absolutely NOTHING in common with anything on this blog. The latest one that I clicked on to see where they were coming from skeeved me out. 

So sorry.

I’m still in a really good mood. I’m still feeling so optimistic about everything. Well, everything except the whole dating thing. I’m don’t feel all mopey about that just kind of Oh well. I mean surely I will not spend the rest of my life without having sex (with someone else!!) again. Right? RIGHT? Several people that I know (online) have recently started dating. So that gives me hope that even I’ll eventually find someone to date.

I’ve been talking to some really great people online in the last week. I don’t know who decided that I was suddenly cool enough and sent out a memo to all the people I wanted to be friends with, but I can’t thank them enough. The 4 key on my phone no longer works right I’ve done so much texting.

I met a really friendly (and cute) nurse at the hospital while I was visiting my mother yesterday. We chatted for about 10 minutes. Then she came back to my mom’s room before I left and asked me if I needed anything else. I still don’t know if I’m reading more into that or not. I so need a flirting guide. Either way I hope that I’ll get another chance to talk to her before my mom comes home. Which should be soon!

I get a much needed break from P tomorrow. Thank god. We are working on week 5(?) of being together 24 hours a day. Well, 19 hours a day if you don’t count the few hours of sleep I accomplish each night. I have an orientation to attend at my school. I’ll finally get to meet some of my classmates. I hope I get along with them since I’m gonna be stuck around them sooooo much for the next year(ish).

Then I’ll get to come home after the orientation and spend an ungodly amount of money on scrubs and supplies. Too bad I couldn’t find some of those at the thrift store like I did with P’s school uniforms for next year. I’ve gotten all the pants he’ll need and 3 shirts. With the shirts and shorts that still fit him from last year he will be set and I’ve spent about a tenth of what I would have if I would’ve had to buy new.

It’s really nice to feel like things are finally going to be alright. I spent such a long time flailing around trying to get my shit together that I almost don’t want to believe that everything could be working out so easily now.

I’ve reached several goals today. Most importantly I got that frigging Transformer back in its original form. I found all of the episodes of a tv show that I wanted to see. I’ve also managed to write 3 blog posts. These two short ones that I’ve posted today and one long one that still needs a little more.

Tomorrow, I’ll take over the world. Wonder if I’m The Brain and P is Pinky or if it is the other way around?

Driving home yesterday I hear from the back of the car 

“The squirrels…squirrels….oh no…squirrels…squirrels…LOOK OUT FOR THE SQUIRRELS!!!” This was prompted by nothing that I’m aware of and there wasn’t a frigging squirrel anywhere around.

Later I hear

“Fire the rockets!”

silence

“Optimus I don’t have any Rockets. You took them”  Gonna go out on a limb and say this was his new transformer toy speaking.

silence

“Oh…My bad…” Guess that was Prime’s reply.

P.S. Oh my Gawd what is wrong with the weather!?!  We’ve been having rain almost every. single. day. WTF? I hate to complain when we usually have drought conditions but I’m trapped in the house every day with a 5 year old.

My mom decided we needed to go to the home improvement store for some kind of ant poison/repellent/something to rain down insect apocalypse on the little fuckers. Have I mentioned she is seriously skeeved by ants? I’m just annoyed by them.

So we get there and are wandering down the aisle and I see a store employee and my mind immediately goes hmmm…what do we have here? (What can I say? Hormones!) So I have to get some assistance just to check her out a little. So she helps me pick out some kind of dual purpose bug spray stuff. (I couldn’t tell you what it was if my life depended on it)

 So I thank her and we wander off to look around it is when we start looking at some flowers that I remember we should go ahead and get something for fleas. So my mom says “You go talk to her and P can stay over here with me” So I mosey back over like the dork that I am and wait for her to finish helping someone else so that I can ask her what I should get. We chitchat for a minute and did I mention she is cute and seems like she might be interested? Anyway there is only so many questions I can ask about bug sprays without sounding even dorkier than I usually do. So once again I’m smiling and telling her thank you before walking off.   

We pay and walk out to the car and while we are driving my mother looks at me, grins (honest to god GRINS at me) and says “Well, she liked you.” I blushed and shrugged and grinned so much that a little girl walking by the car smiled and waved at me.

Maybe I’ll have to think of something I need from L*we’s just to go back.

Ummm…I seemed to have woken up in an alternate universe recently. A universe where my mom is suddenly completely cool with me being gay and is actively trying to get me to meet women. If that is in fact the case I hope tomorrow I’m still here.

*I recently made a joke about my dry spell and the fact that I didn’t see any precipitation in my immediate future.

2 times in the last few weeks P has asked me if I had a girlfriend. Talk about unexpected conversations with a 5 year old. The first time I said that I didn’t. He aurgued and said “yes you do.” He has smartass teenager attitude down cold. (I’m still trying to figure out who my girlfriend might be) Anyway, the next time he asked I told him no, but maybe I would someday.  So he said “after you finish school?” I just told him maybe I’d meet someone while I was still in school. (Please!!)

I have not been on a date since I had P. He has never seen me doing things that people who are dating/together do. I’ve never snuggled on the couch or kissed anyone in front of him. I’ve never left him with someone unless I was going to school or the doctor so he doesn’t have the slightest idea what a date is.  He might vaguely remember some of the fights I had with his father, but I’m hoping he doesn’t because I’d rather not leave him with that as the idea of what being with someone is all about.  

He has heard me say that I’m a lesbian, but it’s not like I went into what exactly that meant. What I would really like to know is where the girlfriend questions are coming from. Do you think 5 year olds talk about stuff like that? Maybe he thinks someone I text or email is my girlfriend? Maybe he noticed me practically drooling over that butch looking woman awhile back? I’m pretty sure anyone with one eye and basic brain function knew I was checking her out. It wasn’t one of my most covert observations I’ll tell you, but it is so rare to stumble upon someone that yummy looking around here. Plus I’m a dork anyway so it’s not like I would’ve made a good impression even if I hadn’t been staring like an idiot. I did manage to make a little small talk so I didn’t completely fail at being a normal human.  

Good grief I just thought of something. Surely he hasn’t overheard my parents talking about it? My mom did act all weird recently and assure me that she didn’t approve of something someone did that was homophobic. I have been a little more open recently but I haven’t said anything they haven’t heard before. I have no doubt that they sometimes talk about me but they wouldn’t talk about me in front of P would they? They know I haven’t been out with anyone in years so I don’t think they would think I had a girlfriend anyway.

Great. Now I’m gonna worry about something silly since I don’t have anything major to obsess over.